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Song Parodies -> "Call Me Maybe (Jerk Edition)"
Original Song Title:
"Call Me Maybe"
Original Performer:
Carly Rae Jepsen
Parody Song Title:
"Call Me Maybe (Jerk Edition)"
Parody Written by:
Blaydeman
The Lyrics
The version of the song a jerk would sing.
Verse 1: I got all dressed for the club
Looking for fun not for love
Then I spied you, you were drunk
And now I know I’m set
I shell out cash for your drinks
And count the times that you wink
Those Cosmos got you I think
And now we’ll enjoy sex!
Hook: Your skin got clammy
Bolt fast, it’s uncanny
I’ll go get the Shammy
I am not your nanny, baby!
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
We had a good time
I’ll call you maybe
It’s hard to think straight
When you’re tipsy
I’ll cut my loses
And call you maybe
Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
You were a fun time
I’ll call you maybe
But I’m not here for love
Don’t be hasty
I’ll take your number
And call you maybe
Verse 2: I’ll toss her number, that’s it
Though she had beautiful eyes
Don’t act like it’s a surprise
I do this ev’ry week
I laugh and go out again
See her when I walk in
I tried to exit that’s when she
Got up in my way
Hook: Her stare was holding
Then her eyes start flowing
I know she’ll be blowing
“Where you think you’re going, baby?”
Chorus: Hey, have I met you?
Cuz girl you crazy!
But you’re real sexy
I’ll call you maybe
I try to get by, this hot lady
“You hit and quit me!”
“I’ll punch you, Brady!”
Ow! She punched my nuts
And I feel shaky
But she hits hard for
A chick of 80!
Wow, none the other girls
Every pained me
Give me your number
I’ll call you Katie!
Bridge: Girl came into my life
You were drunk so bad
And it was so rad
You were the best I had
Before you came into my life
I was a huge ass
And you should know that
And I am so, so glad
It’s hard to think I
Was so shady!
Please take my number
And call me maybe
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is flaky
I think I love you
Is that so crazy?
And all the other girls
That have layed me
Don’t hold a candle
To your love baby
Outro: Girl you fell into my life
And I am so glad
So please don’t be mad
Or hit my go-gonads
Girl, you drank into my life
And that is a fact
And you are so bad
Let’s go have babies!
Looking for fun not for love
Then I spied you, you were drunk
And now I know I’m set
I shell out cash for your drinks
And count the times that you wink
Those Cosmos got you I think
And now we’ll enjoy sex!
Hook: Your skin got clammy
Bolt fast, it’s uncanny
I’ll go get the Shammy
I am not your nanny, baby!
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
We had a good time
I’ll call you maybe
It’s hard to think straight
When you’re tipsy
I’ll cut my loses
And call you maybe
Hey, I just met you
And this is crazy
You were a fun time
I’ll call you maybe
But I’m not here for love
Don’t be hasty
I’ll take your number
And call you maybe
Verse 2: I’ll toss her number, that’s it
Though she had beautiful eyes
Don’t act like it’s a surprise
I do this ev’ry week
I laugh and go out again
See her when I walk in
I tried to exit that’s when she
Got up in my way
Hook: Her stare was holding
Then her eyes start flowing
I know she’ll be blowing
“Where you think you’re going, baby?”
Chorus: Hey, have I met you?
Cuz girl you crazy!
But you’re real sexy
I’ll call you maybe
I try to get by, this hot lady
“You hit and quit me!”
“I’ll punch you, Brady!”
Ow! She punched my nuts
And I feel shaky
But she hits hard for
A chick of 80!
Wow, none the other girls
Every pained me
Give me your number
I’ll call you Katie!
Bridge: Girl came into my life
You were drunk so bad
And it was so rad
You were the best I had
Before you came into my life
I was a huge ass
And you should know that
And I am so, so glad
It’s hard to think I
Was so shady!
Please take my number
And call me maybe
Chorus: Hey, I just met you
And this is flaky
I think I love you
Is that so crazy?
And all the other girls
That have layed me
Don’t hold a candle
To your love baby
Outro: Girl you fell into my life
And I am so glad
So please don’t be mad
Or hit my go-gonads
Girl, you drank into my life
And that is a fact
And you are so bad
Let’s go have babies!
August 18, 2012. Please rate and COMMENT! :)
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 10 | 10 | 10 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
This was great - loved the 'other side' of the OS, then the turnaround and especially the go-gonads. Good job!
I like a good romance story.
Great original song and I love seeing it turned on it's head. Reminds me of Barney Stinson from "How I Met Your Mother"
SOTM...I loved the idea/story of this, and I love the OS...but pacing got me a couple times. Based upon your scores, I might be the only one...so I probably shouldn't ding you. haha.
(SOTM) As I have said many time before, I'm a sucker for parodies that take the original title and turn it on it's head. Though there were a few typos (loses instead of losses being one of the big ones I noticed), this was a fantastic parody, with a pretty sweet ending. 555!
I love the OS, and I am a huge fan of mis-direction lyrics (she had beautiful EYES). Nice work!
Nice job taking the other side with this song. You worked well flipping the original.
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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