Shove this tube way up your bum
You don't poop or have the runs
May your enema make mess
You're backed up no more

Once I ate a lot of beef on vacation
I shouldn't eat the meat from another nation
I scarffed down a tasty feast
Now I pay the price

Though my eyes watered I still could not pinch loaf
Though my legs grew weak I couldn't make a brown float
I clench my fists as I'm squeezing
You can hear me say
Shove this tube far up your bum
You don't poop or have the runs
May your enema make mess
You're backed up no more

It's been two weeks and I still cannot release
My bowels stuffed from eating up a dead beast
And if my sphincter be all swollen, well
It's surely not shaped like an 'O'

On a porcelain seat no normal digestion
Like a clogged up sink stuffed with vegetation
It is no use to take an Ex-Lax
I fear it's much too late!

Shove this tube way up your bum
You don't poop or have the runs
May your enema make mess
You're backed up no more

Up your bum, maybe you will remember
Up your bum, next time you're at the equator
Now your intestines are empty
Now just eat yogurt until June

Shove this tube way up your bum
You don't poop or have the runs
May your enema make mess
You're backed up no more