Well, I don't know why I came out today.
Radio said that at home I should stay.
I'm so scared in case I run off the street,
While I'm drivin' through the snow and the sleet.
Clown cut in front of me,
Swerved off to the right. Here I am
Stuck in a snow drift and screwed.

Yes, I'm stuck in a snow drift and screwed,
And the language that I''m using is crude.
It's so hard to keep a smile on my face
When I'm spinnin' wheels but stayin' in place.
Clowns driving right by me
Laughing at the sight, 'cause I am
Stuck in a snow drift and screwed.

Well I started out alright but then
I spun out in my minvan.
Now I'm slippin' and a-fallin'
Flat out on my back and saying
"Gee-e-e-e-eez!! Gee-e-e-e-eez!"

Tryin' to get some traction and grip
But the tires don't do nothin' but slip.
I give up 'cause all I do is just slide,
And I think that my transmission is fried.
Clown down at Triple-A
Says I'll have to wait, so I am
Stuck in a snow drift and screwed.

(Got no chains!)
Stuck in a snow drift and screwed.

(What a pain!)
Stuck in a snow drift and screwed.