Paperwork's signed, I'm filled with glee
Up high on cloud nine, Racing with speed
Impressed my fans... With my ride
I'm pealing the ground, The asphalt's fried
My parking space once made me glow
Check out the frame! Wait! What's that?! Nooooo!!!!

My brand new car got keyed!
That b*tch was high on weed!
Or maybe drunk on mead!
Perhaps it was Jim Beam!

There's a huge dent, Trapped in a trance!
She grabbed a sharp knife... Hear my rants!
Knew my ex was quite crazed
When she shot pellets... And they sprayed
My heart's in pain, Spent all my dough
I'll shove that dame into the road!

My brand new car got keyed
And now it's paint's bereaved
Too hard to be believed
You bet that I'm aggrieved

[Guitar Solo]

My brand new car got keyed!
My ex was green with greed!
She screwed me, Yes indeed!
So pissed that my nose bleeds!

My sweet sports car got keyed!
Wish it was a bad dream!
Four-letter words I screamed!
Right now I'm pretty peeved!

Expensive whip got keyed!
It looks like a crime scene!
I wasted all my green!
She carved: "Respect the Queen"!