~

There's this thing, I should mention
I attend *that* convention
For thirty-one years
I've glued on these ears
Spock'in' with my Trekies—I’m 'da man!

When I don—*the attire*
Like a pig—I perspire
Vi-car-i-ous-in’
In wig and green skin
Spock'in' with my Trekies—I’m 'da man!

In ‘The Series’ Shat would shag the yeoman
*Mister* Nimoy's nuthin' like that clown

Now Bill’s workin’ Price Line
As their Ho’ man
So my next mission’s—put The Captain down!

Though no fag—or a fairy
I once shagged—Roddenberry
The dude got a shock
To see a nude Spock
Stalkin' through his winder’ green of gland!

In ‘The Series’ Shat was such a poser
He and Bones—at my expense—would clown
Let’s see how Bill plays a decomposer
Once I’ve beamed him six feet underground!

Sixties shows, weren’t as thrilling
Off-screen sex—less fulfilling
To bump it a notch—I’m padding my crotch
Spock'in with my Trekies—in command!

And so to pump it a notch—I’m usin’ six socks
Rockin’-hulkin’, shock'in'-Vulcan gland!

~